An Alternative Lifestyle
The phrase “alternative lifestyle” is used to describe any lifestyle that is perceived to be outside the norm for a given culture. It’s often been used to describe people who have more than one partner, or a partner of the same gender, or those who dress or behave as a gender they are not biologically. In the culture today, alternative lifestyle can be used to describe any number of celebrated mental problems, such as the man who recently spent $14k to “become” a border collie. Society will tell you that you’re not supposed to judge those living such a lifestyle, just accept them, let them “come as they are.” This bleeds into Christian culture and the Christian feels they can’t judge or say anything because we are supposed to accept people, but we’ve lost sight of how Jesus dealt with those living alternative lifestyles. John records an intentional interaction Jesus had with a woman who was living an “alternative lifestyle.”
“Soon a Samaritan woman came to draw water, and Jesus said to her, ‘Please give me a drink.’ He was alone at the time because his disciples had gone into the village to buy some food. The woman was surprised, for Jews refuse to have anything to do with Samaritans. She said to Jesus, ‘You are a Jew, and I am a Samaritan woman. Why are you asking me for a drink?’” (John 4:7-9)
Notice that Jesus didn’t compliment the woman’s outfit or say anything affirming to her—He asked her for something, specifically a drink because she was getting water anyway. Jesus used this tactic a lot to engage with people. He even invited himself over for dinner at Matthew and Zaccheus’ houses. How often do we use this direct approach with people? Rather than compliment them, do we ask them for something, putting ourselves at their mercy?
“Jesus replied, ‘If you only knew the gift God has for you and who you are speaking to, you would ask me, and I would give you living water.’
’But sir, you don’t have a rope or a bucket,’ she said, ‘and this well is very deep. Where would you get this living water? And besides, do you think you’re greater than our ancestor Jacob, who gave us this well? How can you offer better water than he and his sons and his animals enjoyed?’
Jesus replied, ‘Anyone who drinks this water will soon become thirsty again. But those who drink the water I give will never be thirsty again. It becomes a fresh, bubbling spring within them, giving them eternal life.’
‘Please, sir,’ the woman said, ‘give me this water! Then I’ll never be thirsty again, and I won’t have to come here to get water.’” (John 4:10-15)
After asking the woman for something, Jesus enticed her with Truth and He wasn’t concerned with how weird it would sound. Too often we let the fear of how we will be perceived stop us from saying anything. What if they think it’s weird that I tell them I follow Jesus? Jesus said that if she knew who she was talking to, she’d ask Him for living water. That’s weird! But Jesus doesn’t care about how He’ll be perceived! Then Jesus explained His statement and she was in.
“Go and get your husband,” Jesus told her.
“I don’t have a husband,” the woman replied.
Jesus said, “You’re right! You don’t have a husband—for you have had five husbands, and you aren’t even married to the man you’re living with now. You certainly spoke the truth!”
“Sir,” the woman said, “you must be a prophet.” (John 4:16-18)
Jesus dropped a big reveal: I know what you’re doing and I don’t approve. Jesus revealed that He knew this woman and knew the lifestyle she had been living: she’s been married five different times and she was currently living with a man to whom she was not married. Has anyone ever done this to you? Has anyone revealed that they knew what you had been doing in secret and you have to feel the weight of the guilt that someone knew what you had been doing? This woman must have felt the weight of that guilt, but again, Jesus cared for her too much to worry about what guilt she might feel. She responded by claiming that Jesus must be a prophet; she could see there was something different about this man.
How often do Christians go out and the only message they give to the lost is that Jesus loves them? “We just want you to know Jesus loves you.” That’s not the singular message Jesus sent to the woman at the well. He intentionally encountered her because she was living an “alternative lifestyle,” but He never approved of the lifestyle—He called it out! Jesus wasn’t passive and vague because that’s not real love. If there’s a fire in the building, it’s not loving to not tell people just because they may not believe in fire. If we let culture shut us up, then at the end of time Jesus will be as quiet as we were. And if we are lukewarm about our faith, Jesus will spit us out of His mouth.
“‘Everyone who acknowledges me publicly here on earth, I will also acknowledge before my Father in heaven. But everyone who denies me here on earth, I will also deny before my Father in heaven.’” (Matthew 10:32-33)
“‘I know all the things you do, that you are neither hot nor cold. I wish that you were one or the other! But since you are like lukewarm water, neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of my mouth!’” (Revelation 3:15-16)
This culture will celebrate all kinds of sin and pressure the masses to just accept “alternative lifestyles.” We don’t have to accept people’s lifestyles and it is not loving to be passive, vague, or lukewarm: in fact it’s eternally dangerous to do so. Be bold in how you speak Jesus into people’s lives; go with the same boldness Jesus had, the boldness that comes from the Holy Spirit.
May the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, the love of God, and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit be with you all.
